The Sisterhood

Yesterday, I became a lifetime member of an exclusive sisterhood. 

Don’t be jealous. 

Joining this sisterhood is not like joining a sorority where you’re bonded together by a common goal and a mission statement. 

It’s not as glamorous as becoming a member of an exclusive country club. 

Unfortunately it’s not even as beneficial as belonging to SAM’s or Costco club. 

I don’t know of anyone who anxiously waited to join the ranks. 

No one is sitting around contemplating what to wear to the nonexistent induction ceremony. 

There’s no welcome party or monthly meetings. 

This sisterhood is composed of girls and women who have lost their mom’s. 

The ones who no longer have that earthly  representation, in human form, of life that gave them life. 

I didn’t want to be a member. I never signed on the dotted line. 

But now I’m here. 

It’s official. 

I am now a lifetime member of this exclusive club. 

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Sometimes I Cry

Sometimes I cry out of frustration
Other times I cry because my heart is hurting
Then there are the times I cry and laugh
Today I cried because it was time to say good-bye
I cry when life gets overwhelming
I often hear people say, “you are strong”
I’m only strong because I allow myself to cry
It’s the external manifestation of my current internal situation
The tears come when the numbers on the  barometer that measures the atmospheric pressure of my soul gets to high
Numerically speaking, when you multiply responsibility by tension then add negative relations
You get frustration
When frustration is divided by demands
It equals life
And life, in terms of numbers, is prime
When you divide it by its self, you only get one
At times I cry because some days, during this 1 life that I live, are filled with sorrow
But I will take this life and not covet any other
Because this life allows me to cry
If water is cleansing and refreshing
Then my tears cleanse my soul and refresh my spirit
Just a while ago, I said farewell to somebody who was dear to me
Today, was a day that I cried

The Book of your Life

When your story began you had a blank page

as the clock tick tocked the page was filled

with each day that passed another word or phrase was added

more pages

more pictures 

more words

the book of your life was being written 

with every word that was spoken

with every laughter and tear

more pages were added

no wasted space

your book was full

page after page

loyalty and concern

helping and negotiating

strong and tender

facing your fears

you fought and won

you won peace and freedom

even though you are gone

the book of your life remains

the book that was written with each passing day

filled by your life experiences

as your book came to an end

I’ll write on the last page

she was a friend

 

Questions

If you are of the faith that believes there is a heaven and hell once this life is over, I have questions for you. Is there a get into heaven free card when you die a tragic death? No matter your previous choice to believe or not, whether you wanted to be reincarnated or just wanted it all to end at the end. Do you make the list to get into heaven depending on how you die?

I ask these question because of posts on Facebook, the media and other conversations I have heard or had concerning recent tragedies. Everybody assumes the people who were victims of the senseless tragedies all went to heaven. Dare I say it is presumptuous of us to think the adults all wanted to go to heaven or the families of the children want them in heaven. Are the assumptions more about comforting those of us who are here and needing reassurance they are in a better place? Is this thought a  disregard of other faiths as a result of arrogance? Or is it simply our default way of thinking and reacting?

I am sure there wasn’t any malicious intent. However, there doesn’t appear to have been the conscious acknowledgment that maybe, just maybe they wanted a different choice for their afterlife.