Monthly Archives: December 2012

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The Rudolph Syndrome

rudolph
I was listening to the radio this morning when Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer started playing. I hummed along for a few moments until it came to the part about Santa calling on Rudolph because of his nose and asked him to lead the sleigh. All of sudden the other reindeer weren’t calling him names anymore and they weren’t excluding him from the reindeer games. Now they loved him shouted and even shouted with glee that his name would go down in history.

Rewind to several years ago. I was with a room full of moms and each of them was saying how they had always wanted to get married and have babies. They reminisced about being young girls and dreaming this dream. They didn’t know it at the time but I felt out-of-place. I always wanted to be a supreme court justice and have a nanny. As I sat there, I could envision a grove full of trees. None of the trees were exactly alike. I realized I was created to be different, as were you.

Fast forward to this past spring. I was spending time alone to reflect on my life. I realized that my closest set of friends were business majors and could not understand my me fully. I was a psychology major.  I made decisions that were impractical or seemed silly but they made sense to me and usually worked out in the end. Even if they didn’t work out, I was okay with that.

Getting back to Rudolph, my point is he was not liked when he was seen as different. He was misunderstood and according to the movie, it was tough enough that he felt the need to run away to join the other misfits. In the end it worked out for him. Santa saw his value and gave him a position of honor. I say to my fellow Rudolphs it’s okay to be you. There is value in being uniquely you. It may not be easy and you may not get to lead the sleigh but you are valuable no matter where you are in the line up. The others can just go kick rocks. (I think that is the funniest saying)

I wonder, are you a person who looks at others’ uniqueness as a personal challenge to try to get them to conform or do you embrace those people who are different hoping to learn something new and experience something different? There is room in this world for all kinds. Where is the fun in everybody being the same?

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Attention please!

I have started another blog. I wanted to keep all that chatter focused on my thoughts or your thoughts if you are a guest blogger. The other blog is about the other side of me. Click the link and find out all about cutout4it.
http://cutout4it.wordpress.com/
Did I say it’s a work in progress? Well, it is. Don’t let that stop you from checking it out.

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Another true story

A friend of mine met a guy while she was shopping in a superstuffmart one day. This guys seemed nice enough after a few phone conversations and textations (I know it’s not an official word but the way a word becomes official is when a person starts to use it and it catches on. Who would have thought bootylicious would have made it to the dictionary?) therefore, she agreed to go out with him. He told her to wear a pretty dress on the date. She obliged. She carefully planned her outfit for the date. As they made final arrangements, he told her to meet him at IHOP. She thought, this must be the meeting place and then they are going to the real restaurant that must be hard to find.
Here is an excerpt from one of my newer poems that is based on this true story.
The title of the poem is, I’m Better Than That

When he looks at you and says you are beautiful
When he says I get lost in your eyes
Or your smile brightens up a room
Then says let me take you to dinner meet me at IHOP
Say I’m better than that

My friend doesn’t have a problem with going to IHOP but not on a first date after being asked to wear a pretty dress.

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I was talking to a friend one day…

School zone

We were discussing how school was going for the kids. Her daughter and my daughter are bff’s and have been since kindergarten. Anyway, she was telling me that her two children were walking home from school and she had instructed her daughter to call her as soon as she left the school. The mom said she was worried the first day of school because she didn’t get a call when school let out. Just as she was about to leave work to see what happened, she received a call. Her daughter had made it home safely. However, the instructions were for her to call her as soon as she walked out of the building. The next day, they went over the instructions again. Once again, her daughter called her when she was home. Frustrated, the mom sat her daughter down and went over the instructions again. The next day was the same as the previous two days. Finally, the mom asked her why she wasn’t following the instructions to call as soon as she left the building. The daughter replied, the sign says no cell phones in the school zone.
I laughed out loud the first time I heard this and I still smile when I think about the conversation.
Yes, it is a true story.

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Stuff

I have lots of questions running through my mind. The most pressing question today and yesterday and the day before that is why do we compare our lives to others? I have friends with big houses, small houses, apartments, condos, townhouses, expensive cars, cheap cars, and no cars. I know people who are highly successful (success to me is defined by the person attempting to achieve it not the people looking at the attempts) and others that are making it day-to-day.

Why do we to look at each other’s lives and measure the quality of life on the stuff that has been acquired? Who are we to say you need all the stuff to be happy? I know people with a lot of stuff; some are happy and some are not. I know people without any stuff, some are happy and some are not. Does stuff bring happiness, contentment or satisfaction? Or does the acquisition of stuff come with a drive to acquire more stuff? If another person does not have that same drive or the same need why isn’t that okay?

Now don’t get me wrong, I have stuff and I like stuff. I am one of the few people, who I now of, that is happy with my current stuff. I don’t dream of more for the sake of more. My goal at the end of the day is not more stuff. My goal is contentment in the here and now. My here and my now are different from yours. I will not measure your stuff or lack there of and please don’t measure mine. Me and my stuff are just fine.

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The Truth Is

I have another guest blogger this week. I was told I could share this only if they were allowed to remain anonymous. I thought it was thought provoking. What do you think?
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I will never have all of the answers.
I will never understand how there are millions of galaxies full of other planets and stars with orbits, atmospheres and possibly life.
Or how scientists could filet my body but never pinpoint a physical explanation for my love of slurpees and musicals.
I will never find empirical proof of an afterlife, and whether living up to someone else’s standards of morality punches your ticket to it.
I can never answer without a doubt whether men are inherently good or bad.
I will never reach a singular definition for the meaning of life.

I do know, however, that I am granted one century. One century to exist in my present state, as me, cognizant and appreciative of my presence among the universe.

Is it a waste of time, then, to tear and struggle and suffer in search of these deeper meanings, truths, and answers? If we are all given relatively the same span, is the unexamined life more fulfilling? Or is fulfillment only brought with understanding, enlightenment. Can you only appreciate what you can fully grasp?

Regardless of your stance regarding an afterlife. In Christianity you lose all relational ties in heaven, and you will not be you as you are now. In Hinduism you reincarnate with no memory of your previous life. In Judaism Buddhism and Atheism you just die. That’s it.

What do all of these views have in common? That even if you go on to live past your time on earth, you won’t be yourself and you won’t have relationships. All you have is now. The time we are given. Do I ignore this, or try to keep the depressing thought always in mind? Do I abandon my search for experiences, truth and meaning because it doesn’t matter in the wake of my mortality?
Or does it make my search all the more important.

If our lives are so short why are we here?